girlprowess.

god i love this woman.

Thu, 22 May 2008 12:49:00 -0400

Hi, Lubucia,just want to tell you a few suggestions for your trip, remember you are NOT going by yourself,it’s mean, compromise,compromise,compromise, don’t get this attitude, ” why should I…,why not he…,remember,if it not for him,you would go at all, Canada is not Europe and not Latin America,be very carefull,don’t have this faulse security,that there are two of you,it’s same danger,as being by yourself,you are going to C. not to see nightlife,it’s better in S.F.,if he doesn’t want to go to some club,don’t go,and most of all,remember,the main
reason to travel,it’s enjoy this time, be relax,be positive, take a lot of picturesand realy,realy enjoy yout trip

Love you,your mother

Clearly Canada is very much the enemy here. I had no idea. Why is Iran even on our international radar, when we have CANADA to worry about??? Perhaps she thinks I’m about to face an Into the Wild situation… in downtown Vancouver.

By the way, who goes to Canada for clubbing?? Apparently not my mother, ‘cause she’s totally down with the S.F. clubbing scene. She loves the nightlife. She loves to boogie.

what kind of name is petula?

Tue, 20 May 2008 18:58:00 -0400

Hello. I am going crazy at work. Rather than bore you/myself with the details of it all, I will sing what is in my head right now, because otherwise I will break into loud song, complete with interpretative dance, in the middle of my office.

When you’re alone and life is making you lonely

You can always go….downTOWN.

When you’ve got worries all the noise and the hurry

You can always go…downTOWN

Those are the only lyrics I know. This may be the week I lose it and by lose it, I mean lock myself in the supply closet and tremble violently in the fetal position.

Have a nice day!!!!

the chicken or the egg?

Mon, 19 May 2008 12:57:00 -0400

I have not posted anything new here in so long. Like, OMG. It’s just because I’ve been so busy with my important job, living my important life and everyone’s been wanting a piece of me. Yeah I know. I’ve had to neglect you, all of you, my loyal and plentiful audience (hi Albina and Julie! hi Mom!) Sorry. That won’t happen again.

Anyway, the real reason I haven’t updated, is because everytime I sit down to write something, it comes out as way too self-indulgent and frankly, I’m already over it by the time I get to a computer.

I will have to say this though. I have been contemplating fate and the meaning of existence quite frequently these days. More frequently than I ever have ever before. And there is one question I simply cannot ignore any longer. I pose this question to you (and you, and especially you.) My question is:

Does the ”shuffle songs” feature on Ipod sense my mood and offer song selections based upon its intuitions? Or is my mood affected by the next song in the queue? Which came first?? Help me help myself, people.

you know how when.

Thu, 24 Apr 2008 18:51:48 -0400

You know how when you’re lookin’ at pictures of someone and suddenly you have the urge to reach into the photo, grab their face and smoosh it as much as you can in between in your hands? Yeah, I do too.

Yes. A million times yes. The sheer delight (slight decadence?)...

Mon, 21 Apr 2008 12:26:00 -0400

Yes. A million times yes. The sheer delight (slight decadence?) on their faces makes me want a LooLoo so I too can jauntily bounce atop its whimsical stream every morning before work. The big band soundtrack only helps, people…it only helps. Can you imagine Louis Armstrong on that thing, playin’ the trumpet? His cheek radius would swell to awe-inspiring proportions.

leave a message and i'll call You back.

Wed, 16 Apr 2008 13:29:00 -0400

God keeps calling me and leaving messages on my work voicemail.

Sporadically over the past 5 years, I’ve gotten recorded messages in a male Hebrew voice. By the way, I get these messages only when I’m dating an Israeli guy. Maybe I become even more chosen through osmosis? Hm.

I got the latest one last night. I think God said something about Globalcom, so I googled it. Turns out to be a telecommunications company…with the motto of “A Higher Form of Communication.”

I have no idea what any of this means, but I better vacuum soon ‘cause my apartment is in no shape for holy visitors.

a narrow escape.

Mon, 14 Apr 2008 15:02:00 -0400

Although she is the biggest worrier of all times, my mom is not worried about my safety if I travel to the Baltics/Central Europe on my own. She lovingly pointed out that the Russian Mafia who run prostitution rings all over those areas will most likely not bother me on account of my being too old and too short.

Whew.

a young girl's strange erotic journey.

Fri, 11 Apr 2008 15:04:00 -0400

So my latest want in the travel world goes as follows:

Fly into Helsinki, stay for a few days. Take fast ferry to Tallinn. Train/bus through Latvia and Lithuania. From Vilnius take train/bus to Prague or maybe even Paris and fly back home.

Alternative:

Fly into Bucharest, train/bus through Romania, Hungary, Slovakia, Czech Republic and fly home from Prague.

Also

Vietnam/Cambodia/Laos.

My mouth is watering, need plane ticket now.

Banksy

Fri, 04 Apr 2008 13:38:00 -0400

Banksy

"You have great power which you are not using."

Thu, 03 Apr 2008 16:16:00 -0400

“You have great power which you are not using.”

- the only fortune cookie fortune I’ve ever kept.

lord loves a working man and golem concert.

Thu, 27 Mar 2008 18:35:00 -0400

Super fun. The first band was bluesy-funk, lots of horns, get down music from a group of guys wearing three-piece suits and fedoras. Cool.

Golem is a band I want playing at my wedding. Klezmer punk, Fiddler-on-the Roof and a manic accordianist, meets 12 bottles of vodka type of music. Also they played a typical Russian restaurant ballad in a completely non-typical way, as everyone hora-thrashed ‘round the venue. What could go wrong? (other than guests crashing into the cake.)

“Soft Like Me,” Saint Etienne.

Wed, 26 Mar 2008 00:17:23 -0400

“Soft Like Me,” Saint Etienne.

my friend sharon.

Tue, 25 Mar 2008 23:40:42 -0400

My friend Sharon just asked me for an update on life, stuff, etc. I said, I keep fluctuating between feeling strong and independent, and then feeling weird and pine-y.

You know, the usual.

dizzy.

Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:11:56 -0400

Guy next to me keeps tapping his foot violently and shaking my entire cube. I may vomit soon. Can I send him the link to this post?

so wrong. on so many levels.

Mon, 24 Mar 2008 18:12:00 -0400

This weekend I went over to see Russian Jewish Mama for some real food. The rest of the week I survive on candy and cheese.

Anyway, we were watching a very intellectually stimulating episode of E! Channel’s “Top 25 Sexiest Las Vegas Professions.” I forget which number it was, but being a stripper aerobics instructor was included.

RJM: (as girl in hot pants and fishnets attempts to gyrate on-screen) VHY?? Vhat iz so SEXEE about diz? Vhat about hoo yoo are, vhat yoo doo, hoo yoo know…not diz shaking your booby.

Me: NO. DO NOT SAY THIS.

RJM: Oh I say rong? Shaking your BOH-bee? Shaking your bobby? No sexee. SLEEZE!

Me: (traumatized)

And scene.

omg, what have i become?

Mon, 24 Mar 2008 17:25:00 -0400

Me: josh told me i need to start posting the dirt on my blog. i don't know if i can do that because it seems to come out kinda mean. funny but kinda bitchy. and i don't want to hurt you know who's feelings.

Leya: can u post the dirt in code like in sex in the city?

Me: how do you do that? like html code?

elph.

Sat, 22 Mar 2008 18:35:00 -0400

I finally got a new tiny camera, the Canon Powershot Elph. I can literally squeeze it into my pocket but more likely will carry it in one of my tiny purses. Surreptitious. I like it. I’m voyeuristic so consider this your warning!

referrals.

Fri, 21 Mar 2008 02:58:00 -0400

Just noticed that someone found my other blog by searching the term “give me one a good reason to love you and.”

Hmm.

Sure the first part sounds depressively romantic enough but I’m more interested in what comes after the “and.” And… what? Give me one good reason to love me and… buy me a pony??? And… knit me a sweater? Perhaps it’s “give me one good reason to love me and”… also finish my taxes. What come after the “and,” people, what could it be??

Great song though.

bad girls. talkin' bout the sad girls.

Thu, 20 Mar 2008 12:19:00 -0400

bad girls. talkin' bout the sad girls. :

There’s the one study that says women who have sex without condoms are less likely to be depressed because there’s some all-powerful cure-all chemical in semen. Great. L’Oreal should just package that right up.

Then there’s this latest one from Australia. It says depressed women are more likely than their happier counterparts to seek out lots of sex. Coupled sex, random sex, anytime, any place, anyone…make the hollow feeling in the pit of my stomach and bottom of my heart just go away. Happy girls get gardening and scrapbooking. One teensy emotional outburst during the last sales meeting and you’re headed for syphilis and the corner of 16th and Capp Street. P.S. I love the accompanying photo; the essence of Nomi Malone just wafts off the computer screen, n’est pas?

Okay. We’ve all been to a bar at 1:30 in the morning, yes? So this isn’t that shocking of news. On one hand it IS a little sad. We’re all just trying to find love dammit! On the other…whatever. How about you people stop studying us for a minute and go pick up some flowers instead? Thanks!

new limewire music store.

Thu, 20 Mar 2008 11:34:16 -0400

new limewire music store.: This is something even a newbie mp3 player owner like myself can understand. Pay a monthly subscription, get a certain amount of downloads per month. There are 3 price points and all of them wind up being cheaper than $0.99 per song. And it’s legal. Fun!